Holiday,

Exams have ended, holidays have begun!

Today mum messaged me to tell me we’re going on a really unprepared for, trip to Bali.
And I have mixed feelings about this, but I think i’m going to enjoy this in the end.

So how has life been?
Recently, we (KC friends) celebrated Christopher’s birthday, and damn i have not had so much fun since forever. But i really regret doing some things, so…. yeah.

Other than that highlight, School’s out.

Fantastic.

But it’s sad knowing I won’t get to see De, Tessa and Pang for like almost everyday.

They’ve become a huge part of my life and i don’t even want them to leave. )’:
I feel like i’m a better person when i’m with them.
It’s not that I become bad when i’m with my other friends, but i guess you’ll have to be me to know what i mean…

Oh and back to work for me! It’s be first day back at work since the OP and i’m just so glad to knw that i’m not lazy and i’m (apart from dancing) back on track again! ❤

Okayyyy~ so. yup. that’s all i guess.
Gotta pack for Bali.

Will post pictures when i’m back.
I don’t even know if i have an audience cause i refuse to tell anyone of this blog, but if you exist…
You may wait for my pictures to appear ❤ 

Xx, Ju.

Advertisements

Dream a little dream of me…

“a dream is a wish you heart makes, when you’re fast asleep.”

Surprisingly dreamt of someone again

It was a great great great dream (‘:

So lovely, I wish it came true. 
But it’s not right for me to )’:
WHY!!!

For once, it’s me over someone else.
But that once, was in a dream… I’m making ‘me’ sound so pathetic.

Oh well. Just gonna smile to myself about it because no one can really know about it )’:

“Sweet dreams are made of these, who am I to disagree…”

I think i’ll try defying gravity,

My cousin did an awesome cover of the rock version of ‘Defying Gravity’, the song in the wicked musical.
Really really good.

Besides that, I’m currently preparing for a Marketing presentation which i have to do alone because i was absent on the day that my group did it )’: But i’d rather do it by myself than burden them soo… yup.

Lets say at about 3 mins ago, i was at my lowest for today.
I actually felt pretty hurt. like. yeah.
But oh well, these things do happen.
Some people will stay, some people will go.
Some people will use you, some people won’t.
Some people will only be present in your success and absent in your struggle,
and some people will just make you an option – for only when they’re bored.

You only learn these things the hard way, don’t you?

Anyway, I won’t let this ruin my already fantastic day… i’ll just sleep it off (‘:

“Dance is the hidden language of the soul”

“We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once.”

Church today,
Kinda spent the entire time giving Don the ‘I did not see you’ treatment because, in all honesty, I think he deserves it after what happened on twitter yesterday. Other people too of course, some people that I don’t really like.

Massed with Rachel an family, then we had lunch together at Din Tai Fung (:
So grateful for it cause i’ve been craving that for a very long time already,
After lunch, we headed to Wimbly Lu Chocolates, one of my favourite places in the world, for some fantastic desert.

After that, headed home to study some medsoc and then headed off to de’s concert.
Which is why I titled and started of this post with a dance quote.
I miss it. Terribly.

Told Shannon about my 3 months no dance thing and was so close to breaking down,
Having to call cheng up that day and telling them that i couldn’t dance for 3 months was bad enough…
It means to world to me.
I saw Mrs Lim at the concert. (Mrs Lim was my old ballet teacher)
Asked her for advice on ballet and decided that i would take inter straight away since grade 8 is not compulsory.
Where, i’m not sure though. But hopefully somewhere that does intakes in January because i’ll only be able to commit then.

De’s concert was good nonetheless…
Found only her items and the other pointe item the most interesting though..
Overall, great day.
I’ll go back to some medsocking now before i fall asleep (:

Thanks for listening, whoever.

xx,
Ju.

“Dance, when you’re broken open. Dance, if you’ve torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you’re perfectly free.”

Honestly, I’m lost.

Was playing around with WP and found the drafts,
how could i be so daft as to not know where the drafts were?
hehe.
Anyway, i completed it and here it is (:

Watched Something Borrowed yesterday,

No matter how many times I watch something, it still has the same effect on me.
Well for movies at least.

I can watch a walk to remember again and again and still cry, at the same parts.

However, this time it was different.

I’ve watched something borrowed before and I don’t remember crying as much as I did yesterday…
My heart actually ached watching the movie, and I think it’s because I identify with it.

You know how when you listen to songs, you think of that one person it reminds you of? and same with movies?
It’s not so for this, there are just so many people that i’m thinking of watching this.

If you haven’t watched the show, here ‘s the synopsis;

It’s pretty much a show about betrayal and friendship and love – All in one.
So the people I must be thinking of are friends, and past lovers (since there aren’t any now).
I was just lost and had a very heavy heart for the rest of the day,
but i guess i’m much better now.

On a saturday by the sea, oh you should have seen my sweetie and me,

Woke up early today to take Jeselle to sailing class,
it’s cute, really.

This girl has too much to do, from gym to sailing to whatever not, and hardly any time to study.

I really hope she realises that studying is important soon, that or she becomes an athlete.

After that, we had lunch at i12katong and then home then out again for dinner at night at the place where we usually go for bachormee and xlbs.

That was today.

Anything I need to rant about? Yes.

I don’t know why, but i’ve been feeling pretty lonely recently.
And that’s not unusual, but what is, is that i don’t know who i need.

Back then, when ‘boyfriends’ were the cool thing to have, I always had someone in mind,
If it were to end, someone new would appear in my head. That’s probably how bad I was.
And i’d go to sleep to a goodnight text every night, or with hopes that someone i liked would like me back.

Not today.

I just lost it, I have zero interest in love. And i’ve been saying that for awhile now,
but i’ll let you in on something, It hasn’t always been true…
I did have a crush on someone near the first quarter of the year. I’m guessing since i said when, you can pretty much guess where and how this crush developed and i’m sure guessing who it is, wouldn’t be very hard. But i still won’t say who.

I’ve given up on that though, figured it was too childish, and that school was IS so much more important. And that this person, deserves so much better and so much for than I have to offer.

Now that you know i’m not “boy crazy” anymore, i just want to address the fact that i’m an attention seeking whore and i need to constantly know that someone cares about me or something like that, I don’t know what it is i want, ugh. this is tough.

I was about to post a blog post about my experience with the show something borrowed, but i accidentally clicked something wrong and there was no draft saved ( that’s th bad thing about wordpress. )
Well, if that was posted, you’d know roughly why I’m feeling kind of ‘Meh‘.

Oh well, that’s probably all i can say in a blog right, incase any friends find this shit.
Hahahaa, goodnight and goodbye.

Happy National Day,

Party just ended.

So there was a national day bbq at my place with the extended family,
Not bad at all (:

Food was lovely

Didn’t end on a fantastic note as i fought with dad, but it was really too much.

If i really am a waste of time and money just tell me in my face, really.
I’ll cry then get over it. Big whoop.

And now im going to sleep. Up tomorrow to study for Media and Society and then i’ll need to get prepared for marketing presentation and W&P presentation…

Ugh, School’s such a chore.

Back,

On the 4th of August 2012,
I was headed for Clement Coutou’s (Probably the sweetest baby in the world) 1st birthday party.
Didn’t have much to eat before that, but i figured it wouldn’t matter since I was going to a BBQ anyway.

On the busride there, I had a sudden ache in my tummy.
I figured it was the norm, the norm being gastric.
So yes, I have a bit of a gastric problem.
When i arrived, I went to see the birthday boy and Anna first, but we headed down for food soon after.
Didn’t tell anyone of the pain because i thought it would ease after I had food. It didn’t.

The pain got from bad to worse and was soon excruciating. 
Finally let anna know i was in pain and Cheryl and Cyril gave me something to take to ease the pain.

This gastric thing has happened before and so I called mum to ask her to fetch me as i wasn’t feeling well.

Thinking i should just go home and take the medicine that was given to me the last time this happened, I told them to head straight home.

I don’t know exactly what happened after that, but i found myself at the doctors. Mum must have convinced me to go to the doctors in the car ride home. 
When the doctor saw me and examine me. He asked to explain where my pains were and when I did, he told me that this was more than gastric, he suspected appendicitis.

So they took me to the hospital, Mount Alvernia, and I was put on a bed to rest.
Next thing i know, a doctor came in to examine me and confirmed that i did in fact, have acute appendicitis.
A sweet sweet nurse – Magdalene Yuen, I still remember looking hard at the name tag because I wanted to thank her so much for being such a sweet lady, which i didn’t get to, – told me i had to be warded and soon i was headed to a single bed room. Thanks to my father who loves me so so so much (:

On a lighter note, something funny did happen on my way to the room.

An indian helper wheeled me to my room on a wheelchair. When we arrived at the room, he tried so so hard to open the door but couldn’t. Then my dad was like, “are you sure this is the room? It reads switch room!” I looked up and the panel on the door really did read switch room. My room, room 106, was on the left. As stupid as it was, it was funny.

Jokes aside, I was supposed to be discharged on monday, but ended up staying till wednesday due to the slow recovery of my body.
My stay there was rather pleasant and I’m so thankful to some of the nurses there (‘:

So yes, i just got home from the hospital today, and i’m missing home more than ever.

I did find out something terrible though….

I’m on PE MC for 3 months.
Anyone who knows me well enough, knows that Dance is my life.
I don’t know how i will cope being away from dance for three months,
And it’s depressing thinking of the weight i’ll put on with no exercise…

Oh well, there’s nothing much i can do about it right, 
What has happened, has happened. And things happen for a reason.
As Leland said, “Something good will come out of this.” and I hope something does.
I’m pretty sure he got that from someone else, but i’m too lazy to give proper credits.

Whatever it is, I know God is by my side and he won’t let me fall.
Thanks for being there for me through it all (‘:

I Love You.

And to my friends and family who have gone through this shocking and pretty unfortunate period of my life, 
I thank you for being there for me, and i’m forever grateful for you all (‘: I love you guys too!